AT THE MOVIES; Growing Up in a family of achievers.
NYTimes - almost 35 years
''Isn't that Mary McFadden?'' - but no celebrity spots her back, even though Miss Shire, with two Academy Award nominations behind her, is more famous than most of the people in the room. Always, she's kept a low profile, ''like an alien, observing everything.'' She comes, she says, ''from a family of artist men.'' Daughter of the composer and